Why You Feel Undeserving of Praise – The Psychology of Impostor Syndrome

The project was successfully completed. The manager said, "This was possible thanks to you," and colleagues congratulated you. But somewhere in your mind, thoughts linger: 'What did I really do so well...', 'I was just lucky.' You clearly made an effort and the results were good, yet why do you feel undeserving of praise?

Surprisingly many people experience this. Moments when despite objectively achieving something, they feel undeserving of it.

What is Impostor Syndrome?

Psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes discovered an interesting phenomenon in 1978 while studying highly educated women. People with objectively excellent achievements couldn't recognize their success and felt like frauds. They named this phenomenon impostor syndrome or impostor phenomenon.

People with impostor syndrome attribute their achievements to luck, timing, or others' help. They believe "It's not because I did well, I was just lucky" and feel anxious that their 'incompetence' will eventually be exposed.

The Psychology of Not Internalizing Success

Psychology distinguishes between internal and external attribution of success. Internal attribution thinks "It's thanks to my ability and effort," while external attribution thinks "It's thanks to luck or external factors."

People with impostor syndrome tend to attribute success externally and failure internally. When things go well, "I was lucky"; when they don't, "It's because I'm inadequate." This attribution pattern weakens self-esteem and prevents feeling accomplishment.

Perfectionism and High Internal Standards

Impostor syndrome is closely linked to perfectionism. According to psychologist Carol Dweck's research, people with a fixed mindset view ability as innate and interpret mistakes as evidence of lack of ability.

Perfectionists set extremely high internal standards. Even with 80 points, they think "Anything less than 100 is failure." What looks excellent to others is still a "lacking" result to them. When hearing praise, they think "They didn't look properly" or "They don't know it's not perfect."

Conditional Acceptance in Childhood

The roots of impostor syndrome can often be found in childhood experiences. Psychologist Carl Rogers proposed the concept of conditional positive regard.

If parents or caregivers expressed love and recognition only "when grades were good" or "when obedient," the child learns they have value not for their existence itself but only through achievements. As adults, the belief "I can only be recognized through success" persists, along with the anxiety "Current success is accidental and I'll eventually fail."

Influence of Comparison and Competition Culture

Modern society emphasizes constant comparison and competition. From school days through grade rankings, university hierarchies, and workplace evaluations, we grow up in environments that emphasize relative position.

According to psychologist Leon Festinger's social comparison theory, people evaluate their abilities by comparing with others. The problem is that when always making upward comparison with those better than oneself, the feeling of inadequacy is reinforced.

When thoughts like "There are so many smarter people than me" or "That person must have worked much harder than me" automatically operate, one's achievements always seem relatively small.

Gender and Social Stereotypes

Early research reported impostor syndrome as more common in women. This relates to social stereotypes. When biases like "Women lack leadership" or "Women are weak in technical fields" become internalized, even upon success, doubts arise: "Do I really belong here?"

However, recent research reveals men also experience impostor syndrome, particularly in fields traditionally dominated by women (nursing, elementary education, etc.), where men feel similar anxiety.

New Environments and Role Transitions

Impostor syndrome often intensifies when environments change, such as promotions, job changes, or starting new projects. Taking on unfamiliar roles brings thoughts like "I'm not ready yet" or "Someone else would be more suitable."

Psychology calls this role transition anxiety. When lacking confidence in a new role, past successes are dismissed as 'only working in the previous environment,' leading to doubting current abilities.

The Paradox of Praise and Expectations

Ironically, receiving much praise can sometimes intensify impostor syndrome. Hearing "genius," "the best," or "perfect" creates pressure to maintain that image.

In Carol Dweck's research, children praised for ability subsequently avoided difficult tasks. They feared that failing would "expose them as not being a genius." Praise actually reinforced the belief "I'm a fraud and will eventually be caught."

Daily Observation Points

Check if you show signs of impostor syndrome. When successful, do you automatically think "I was lucky" or "It's thanks to others"? When hearing praise, do you feel uncomfortable and anxious that you'll "eventually be exposed"? When taking on new roles, do you think "I'm not qualified"?

If these thoughts repeat, you may be influenced by impostor syndrome.

Several practices help overcome impostor syndrome. First, record your achievements. Writing down specifically what you were praised for and what you did well provides objective confirmation that "It was my effort, not luck."

Second, reinterpret failure as a learning process rather than lack of ability. Practice accepting that being imperfect is okay.

Third, share these feelings with trusted people. People experiencing impostor syndrome think "Is it just me?" but many actually feel similar anxiety. Simply sharing reduces isolation.

Feeling undeserving of praise is not modesty. It's denying your effort and ability. Success is not accidental but the result of effort. The achievements you've made are yours, and you fully deserve praise. Recognizing this fact is the first step toward removing the mask.

This article is reference content based on general psychological information, and interpretations may vary depending on individual circumstances.